Half A Life


h1 Posted 4 years, 11 months ago around lunchtime by oso

Airlines have yet to figure out what the buses already did long ago. And that is this: if your seatbelt ever becomes of any use to you, it is already too late.

Especially when they tell me it is recommended that I keep my seatbelt fastened at cruising altitude; that especially pisses me off. I don’t know where the hell cruising altitude is, but it seems a god damn good place to actually exhale at ease.

I have learned that on AeroMexico there are three types of peanuts served. They are

  • Toasted without oil
  • Japanese peanuts
  • Japanese lemon peanuts

You do not want the Japanese lemon peanuts. I’m all for multi-culturalism … I’m even semi-tolerant of mangoes with chili powder. But mixing a peanut (which the Peanut Institute tells us originated in South America) with a fried soy/flour shell and then lemon powder? Please. That’s like fucking a dead duck.

Wanna hear more about airlines? Good. So as I’ve sorta mentioned, I’m supporting my taco habit by teaching English classes around town. From the About page:

Oso now lives in Monterrey, Mexico with his girlfriend. During the day he exploits the working class and plunders Mexican sovereignty by teaching English to managers of multi-national companies.

So mostly I sit around in air conditioned corner office suites and rap with old people in thousand dollar suits about golf and their secretaries/girlfriends. But when we’re bored we open up the books and look for some fun. Given that the “revolutionary color chart system of mastering English” of the company I work for is such a joke, I thought the books would be too. And they are – they’re hilarious. This morning I was sitting with some old putz and we were going over vocabulary related to business travel. Mostly the kind of stuff you find on Mango Sauce. Then it was time to read the article that accompanies each unit and the whole thing was about how some 70 year old hit his stewardess when he found out there was no more steak left. We thought that was great. Then we went on talking about his secretary/girlfriend.

Which brings me to my next point. Since when did “So” become the official way to begin a response? I’m a big fan of the podcasts on itconversations.com which records interviews and conferences with geeks and lets you listen to what they have to say without smelling their breath. But these people can absolutely not answer a question without starting it with with “So …” or “So … it turns out that …” And it’s not only geeks; graduate students are also infected. It’s such a sick disease. Don’t you people understand how belittling it sounds? You don’t have to tell me “So … it turns out, little man, that the world is actually round” just tell me it’s a freaking sphere. I think this should be official podcast (and grad school) etiquette: no starting responses with “So …”

Can you believe this. What site pops up first when you search for cacahuates japoneses? We’ve got some content problems around here. And so far Ourmedia doesn’t seem to be helping.

I’ve been trying to get my little sister to come visit me in Monterrey for the past six weeks, but as I’ve already covered in depth, she hates Mexicans. Lucky for me, the White Stripes are coming to town (she’d never agree to seeing, let’s say, the Brown Stripes) and so now she says she’s excited to come visit. Anyway, it’ll be cool to eat some goat with her.

I was nonline for about a week so now I’m playing catch up with emails, podcasts, and rss feeds. During la semana santa though, I got in some quality reading time. More to come on the actual books, but I’ve got a list going here.



10 comments | Feed for comments | Trackback URL

  1. 1Gustavo from United States says:

    So…what are you trying to say?

  2. 2oso from Mexico says:

    Question form … totally valid.

  3. 3xoloitzquintle from United States says:

    I never had cacahuates japoneses with lemon (or did you mean lime [limon]?), although they sound good to me. I have a problem with the chili and lime cacahuates, though (meaning that I consume way to many of them when I encounter them).

    As for keeping your seatbelt fastened – I have had some memorable experiences with turbulence that resulted in my head getting to know the light/vent/call button console much too well. So I think it is sound advice, but you can do whatever you want – especially on Aeromexico.

    I hope you have fun with your sister and the she enjoys the cabrito.

  4. 4cindylu from United States says:

    I don’t even like the cacahuates japoneses they hand out. I like my cacahuates plain and salted. Next time I’m in class or I’m just having a simple conversation with a fellow graduate student I’m going to listen for how many times I hear him/her begin a sentence with “so…”.

  5. 5elenamary from United States says:

    I like my cacahuates japoneses with valentin hot sause. I put the sauce straight into the bag, shake the bag and then slurp the peanuts up through the top of the bag emm good. It used to be you couldn’t get these things in Ohio so once I brought back a suitcase full of cacahuates japoneses and valentine sauce dear lord that is some good shit. I also like my mangos with chili especially the green ones. I am hard pressed to think of a food that doesn’t taste better with chili. Anyone?
    I use the word “so” and “anyway” in almost all my blog entries.

  6. 6El Moreno from United States says:

    i say “so” as an answer to a question but only when its followed by “what” and a slap to the face of my inquisitor.

  7. 7oso from Mexico says:

    That’s funny. With me you always add a “bitch” on the end. I do feel special.

  8. 8Daily Texican from United States says:

    It sucks. I use “so” tambien. Chingado!

  9. 9Podcastplayer.org news » El Oso, El Moreno, and El Abogado � Blog Archive � Half A Life from Germany says:

    [...] Has “so” become the new “err” or “umm” ? Read more at El Oso, El Moreno, and El Abogado � Blog Archive � Half A Life

    [...]

  10. 10J-Flea from Mexico says:

    I JUST ATE A BAG OF THEM PEANUTS WHEN I DECIDED TO LOOK IN THE WEB TO SEE WHAT COULD TURN OUT BY TYPING JAPANESE PEANUTS, OHHH WHERE HAVE I STUMBLED UPON…!!!??….IT SEEMS A LOT OF PEOPLE (EVEN WHITE FOLKS) LIKE THEM…….I ALSO LIVE IN MEXICO (TIJUANA ANYWAY)……IF I COULD FIND A WAY TO SEND TONS OF PEANUTS NORTHWISE………PEPITO ARE MY FAVORITE BRAND……



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