Comments on: Aggression and Reconciliation

By: DD

DD — Wed, 19 Jan 2005 15:38:37 +0000

I don’t know how I’m going to survive with all my friends becoming lawyers. Already, all their arguments start with, “you have to think about it from a legal perspective.”

Yeah, whatever.

–Oso

The one the I like is, “What would a reasonable person do in the given situation”?

–DD

For me, the real challenge is making the time and knowing where to prioritize, where to invest my time.

–Oso

Yes, prioritization is key. Delegating is key. Balance is key……and then of course you have to set aside some personal thinking time.

I like what you did with your website. It is more “reader” friendly.

By: jon o

jon o — Wed, 19 Jan 2005 06:15:05 +0000

I’ve always felt that there’s a third, overriding emotion that most people actually choose – fright. Deer in the Headlights. From personal experience, the overriding emotion in a stressful situation is Do Nothing. Freeze. And then shove your head the sand, ala that grandiose grotesque of darwinian humour, the Ostrich. When asked what emotion has most shaped human history, I side with Dostoyevski – Shame. Sel-Pity. That deleterious urge to consciously fuck yourself royally.

I try with Eggers, I really do, but I just can’t get past something in his style, something that I’ve tried defining a hundred different ways but it’s still eluding me, still riding the edge of a subjective I Just Don’t Like the Guy’s Writing subjectivity. Maybe logorrhea is a great term to describe it – the overdose of verbiage when just a simple phrase would do – or maybe it’s his knowitallity (speaking of off the cuff terminology) that gets me, like to use the phrase ‘that was the most profound pleasure she had ever known.’ is to assume, in literary terms, the ability to crawl inside of someone else’s mind, something that I don’t feel one should ever attempt, not even involving the mind of a purely fictional character. I find doing that to be pretentious, and just plain rude. But maybe that’s just me…

By: mcbk

mcbk — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 05:12:08 +0000

BTW, I’m very impressed that I can translate this blog into Romantic languages, that’s pretty cool.

However … I’m waiting on Hebrew and Cyrillic.

By: mcbk

mcbk — Tue, 18 Jan 2005 05:10:31 +0000

That’s a great book … I have it in my collection.

… which reminds me, I have psych to catch up on…

To this post, I say, “Amen, hallelujah, and all those other fun things that go on in the choir!”

Peace … and all that happy hippie stuff.

By: cindylu

cindylu — Mon, 17 Jan 2005 23:04:10 +0000

I hate when people, like you, recommend books that I don’t have time (or make time) to read. It makes me feel sad. And by the way, I didn’t start actually engaging in conflict until I got older. Conflict was usually with my parents and I always left that to my older brother because he was really good at it.

By: DD

DD — Mon, 17 Jan 2005 17:56:33 +0000

But how do you sustain those moments? And especially in a relationship. It’s so easy for us to take each other for granted. Sometimes we get drunk or do drugs and go dancing … that can do the trick temporarily, but it feels fake and it doesn’t satisfy the emotional need like the real thing.

–Oso

I suppose you can sustain those moments by visiting a coffee shop and thinking of conversational topics? Such as……..asking your friend/lover questions like:

“What are your dreams and aspirations”?

“How do you feel about this situation”?

“What do you live and breathe for in life”?

You know………the thought provoking questions.

Dancing is good because it is a method of good cardio exercise. It gets your endorphins going.

By: DD

DD — Mon, 17 Jan 2005 17:51:57 +0000

Good entry, Oso.

‘It’s no secret to anyone who knows me that I am of the second breed. I don’t fight, I fly. I’m trying to work on it. I’m trying to deal with conflicts as they come up, but I have little patience for – what often feels like – arguing for the sake of arguing’.

–Oso

I am a fighter, but I try to choose my battles. Keyword is try.

My advice to you? Never, ever, ever marry a lawyer….they live for the sake of argument.